Love Without Boundaries

It's been a while, but I wanted to share the amazing things that Love Without Boundaries has been doing. I've talked of their work helping children in orphanages, but this feature on Amy Eldridge is the result of winning one of the awards given for Cookie Magazine - their Smart Cookie of the Year award!

China eases restrictions on illegally adopted children

A new policy guideline eases the law on most illegally adopted children in China.

The legal rights of these children are currently not guaranteed such as permanent residence of a city, schooling and inheritance.

The guideline was jointly issued by five ministries on Sept 5, but made public on Monday.

It allows people to register their illegally adopted children without fear of punishment.

Ji Gang, director of the China Center of Adoption Affairs, said the number of illegal adoptions has been increasing rapidly in recent years.

"In less developed areas, the number of unregistered adoptions can be two or three times more than registered ones," he said.

"In big cities where people have a better knowledge of the law, the number of unregistered adoptions is fewer."

Shanghai, for example, between 1992 and 2000, had more than 7,000 registered adoptions and about 4,000 unregistered ones.

Ji said China has more than 20,000 registered adoptions every year.

To adopt a child legally in China, a person must be more than 30 years old, healthy, childless and with a good and steady income.

Those seeking registration under the new guideline will be exempt from these requirements except in the case where a single male parent is not more than 40 years older than the girl he has adopted.

If this is not the case, the man will be persuaded to surrender the child to a children's welfare institute.

The guideline also requires anyone who finds abandoned babies to hand them over to police in the first instance.

If the police fail to find their biological parents, the children will be handed over to local children's welfare institutions.

If people who find such babies meet the necessary requirements and want to adopt them, they will be given first priority.

"It means you can not take an abandoned baby home and then apply for adoption. They must be handed over to the authorities first," Ji said.

He said the guideline will help in the fight against trafficking of infants and children.

One Year - Happy Anniversary Lucy!

It's hard to believe that it has been a year - and then it's easy to believe that another year has gone by. Today, July 2, is the one year anniversary of Lucy's adoption in China. It was a hot, amazingly sticky day in Fuzhou, not too far off what it feels like in Seattle today - and we had been preparing most of the day after travelling to Fuzhou from Beijing with the two other couples who were meeting their children - Scott & Chris, and Travis & Michelle. After days swealtering in Beijing and wondering if we'd ever see blue sky again, we set off for Fuzhou.

The actual getting ready to meet the kids was a funky affair. Far too much running back and forth as we learned they had forgotten to have us copy this document, or bring two copies of another document, to prepare this cash or that voucher, this form to have ready - and then getting it all pulled together. After a few false starts to actually walking into the conference room where we would meet the kids, in we went. We were joined by Lynn, who was meeting her older son who is from Lucy's orphanage.

As we sat and waited we tried to get ready - food out, toys out, cameras ready or not ready... And then SLOWLY the kids started to arrive. Malone literally RAN into the room to meet his mom Lynn and his new sisters. By the time we figured that he was there, I was able to see Lucy coming into the room with the Director of her orphanage. She was so small - smaller than a 27 month old should have been, quite frankly. They handed her to me, and she was so light - and to my suprise, in no diaper at all. We got to know each other with cheerios and toys. She would not take off the little backpack that she had arrived with, and in holding her I knew I would have to shop for new clothes - the ones I brought would be way too big. (Note: she is just starting to fit into those clothes this week!)

After about 15 minutes, Shen arrived for Travis & Michelle. Not to be outdone by good behavior in Lucy, Shen came into the family with a BANG! Yelling, screaming, and crying - poor guy! He was not sure about this new mama and baba and wanted all of us to know. Lucy, for her part, just wondered what the fuss was about. Shen wanted nothing to do with baba, and sat on mama's lap screaming. None of the balls, stickers, cars would suffice to distract him. Thankfully - there were bubbles - which proved to be a GREAT distractor.

By the time he settled down, Jade arrived for Chris and Scott. Not sure if she should scream, she settled for something in between - tears and unhappiness for sure, but not the raw emotion shared by Shen. She settled in with either her mama or baba, and I think immediately realized that here were folks who could worship her!

A year later, Lucy is finally the size of the child I was anticipating getting last year. She is only a few months older than what I thought she would have been. After returning to the states, bone scans confirmed my belief - that she was considerably younger than her paperwork stated - anywhere from 6-10 months younger. During this past year I have legally changed Lucy's birthdate by 4 months - taking the 8 month average for how much younger she was, and splitting the difference, just in case there is a mistake. However, each day in watching her developmentally I believe that she is probably about 8-10 months younger than the 27 months she was supposed to be, which would have put her at 17-19 months old when I got her. Hopefully she will like the new birthday, and not fret too much that I changed one important piece of who she was and her story from China.

Lucy has come a long way in the past year, and still has quite a journey. She is one of the most spirited and smart, independant and daring little girls I know. She loves her big sisters, and copies them far too often. She is very healthy thanks to surgeons in China who repaired her heart, and loves to laugh. Happy Adoption Day, Lucy!

China lifts one-child policy in earthquake region

The adoption world has been busy the last few weeks mobilizing around specific charities that are assisting with earthquake relief. Now, the NYTimes is reporting that China is lifting one-child policy in the earthquake region so that parents may choose to adopt children orphaned by the tragedy.

New report of child slavery in China

Yahoo! reported last week on the latest investigation in China of child slavery. In a recent raid in Guangdong Province, hundreds of children were rescused from factories where they were being treated as virtual slaves.

I think it's interesting to consider that while these children were working unpaid for years at a time, what the economic considerations were for their parents to submit their children to such a life. Was this better than where they were? Were the economic needs of their parents so severe that selling their child was the only option?

Child slavery, child trafficking and infant abandonment all stem from one place in China - the one child policy. However, let's not think that this is a situation that is unique to China. Child trafficking and slavery, is occuring all over the world. While the press is focused on China due to changes in adoption laws, and the upcoming Olympics, we need to remember that this is not a Chinese issue, but rather a WW issue.

That being said, the attention is on China. I look forward to seeing how Beijing will respond to this latest round of press, and what steps will be taken within the country to put an end to trafficking of children.

A Desperate Search for Stolen Children

In an article published by the Washington Post yesterday, there is more light being shed on child abduction and trafficking in China. Unfortunately, authorities and the government are doing nothing to protect their citizens and children, and often police look the other way or are paid off by those who have kidnapped children and adults.



With the Beijing Olympics only a few months away, I hope that we see more and more of these articles. It's hard to get attention on them, and I sincerely hope that all of the press in China will allow for these issues to be explored. Either they can deal iwth the issue, or their system will eventually implode on itself. The people cannot continue to be pushed down for so long -the rumblings of discontent will flare up again. I say good luck, and godspeed.

No change in One-Child Policy

In an article published today, the wide-spread hope of additional changes to China's One-Child policy appears to have died with the announcement that there will be no change in the policy for at least another decade.

While I understand China's desire to control the population as it develops, they have not successfully dealt with the side-effects of the one-child policy: infant abandonment, infantacide, child kidnappings and child trafficking - all amazingly shocking issues occuring on a daily basis in China, where children are often treated like commodity items, to be traded, sold or killed at the whim of the parents. While it is interesting to watch China trying to enter modern commerce, I am constantly reminded at how far they have yet to come in order to truly be ready to meet the challenges of this next century.

News

Yahoo reporting of 8 deaths at a SWI in southern China...

Time for one-child policy to change

On February 24th a YunFei, a 20 month old girl, was being taken by her paternal grandparents to be raised at their home in Guizhou Province. Instead, the grandparents left the train with her and attempted to kill her by placing her in the path of an oncoming train. Yunfei survived -- with both legs amputated. (Read the full story here)

The reason for this? Her mother spectulated that it was because the she had borne two daughters instead of sons.

The impact of the one-child policy continues to be felt far. Whether through child abductions and kidnappings, to infanticide, or infant abandonment, China need to move forward in as forceful a way as they did when the revolution occured. Truly, if there was need for a revolution, it would be one to shake preset beliefs to their foundations - and change how children in China are treated.

Today the LA Times reported on the potential for China to re-address its one child policy. More important than the discussion of the policy, will be a strong stand, backed by action, in determining what occurs to people who violate the laws in areas like kidnapping and child trafficking or infanticide. Make girls acceptable to family and society. Maybe pay families who have girls; free secondary education for second or third daughters; how about accepting all babies and making them legal, instead of forcing parents to hide daughters so they can have a son; how about hiring and training a force of 5,000 detectives to investigate and crack down on child trafficking -and making the penalty for getting in the way of the investigations worse than if that person had a no-papers child.

It's time for China to wake up, face the rest of teh world, admit there is a serious flaw in the one-child policy, and get aggressive on ways to deal with the issue now and in the future. How many YunFei's are there, that we never hear of? The drip of these issues hitting the press should continue until the impact of the full waterfall is felt and China reacts.

A guide to driving in Beijing during the Olympics

By Ken Wills

Tourists seeking their own Olympian challenge while attending the Beijing Games this August might be tempted to get behind the wheel of a rental car and take a spin on the roads of the Chinese capital.

For these intrepid tourists, here are some tips about how to drive in Beijing, a city with three million vehicles on its roads. Those who find the road rules overwhelming can ride the subway or take taxis, buses or limousines to sports venues. 1. Physics 101

Beijing drivers seem eager to challenge the physics principle that no two objects can simultaneously occupy the same point in space.

For instance, lane markers are largely ignored, serving no real purpose in keeping cars apart. When drivers want to get a good look down the road but the view is blocked by cars in front, drivers don't think twice about sliding halfway into the next lane and then straddling two lanes for as long as seems comfortable.

It's also not uncommon for drivers who have missed their exits to simply put the car in reverse and back up into traffic.

2. No-Look Turns

Some countries have rules allowing right turns on red lights. Beijing has something unique: No-look turns. That's right, they follow the maxim that "if you see me, you're responsible for not hitting me," and its corollary, "if I don't see you, it's not my fault if I hit you."

As a result, drivers regularly come flying into streets, merge onto highways or even switch lanes without the slightest attempt to check whether the way is clear.

This habit seems a direct extension of China's bicycle culture, whereby every move is a calculated negotiation among throngs of cyclists flowing at roughly the same speed and in the same direction.

Keep your eyes open.

3. Emergency Lights

Don't panic if you see a police vehicle's flashing lights in your rear-view mirror. As a Chinese friend explained, police and other emergency workers typically turn them on just to show they are on duty. If there's no accompanying siren or honking, you can ignore them. Everyone does.

China may be an authoritarian state, but that doesn't mean authorities get much respect. Certainly, on the road they have to fend for themselves. Ordinary drivers can be seen honking and flashing bright lights at patrol cars that were deemed to be going too slowly.

4. Lost in Beijing

Reading maps is critical for anyone navigating a foreign city. But newcomers to Beijing may want to familiarise themselves not just with Beijing's main streets but also its bridges. That's because major intersections are known by the names of the overpass bridges that link intersecting streets.

Strangely, English maps give only the names of the roads, not the bridges. Road signs, however, give distances to upcoming bridges, not the roads. Go figure.

5. Give An Inch

Perhaps it's understandable in a country of 1.3 billion people that you don't get ahead by patiently waiting your turn. On the road, as in other aspects of their lives, Beijingers tend to grab opportunities whenever they appear.

Such chances might come in the form of a few inches of space between cars in the next lane, just enough to squeeze in the car's nose and present the driver behind with the dilemma of giving way or causing a collision.

The good thing is that Chinese drivers are generally not aggressive, and the high-testosterone road rage that is common on many U.S. highways, for instance, is not typical in Beijing.

6. Now Exhale

To its credit, Beijing is trying to keep drunk drivers off the road by making random spot-checks. Officers armed with portable breathalyzers jump from the curb when cars stop for red lights, forcing drivers to exhale into the machines.

Unfortunately, the mouthpieces are used over and over as the officers move down a row of cars.

When this driver made a feeble attempt to blow into the machine without making contact with the mouthpiece, an impatient officer suspected he'd caught a transgressor. He ordered me to the curb-side for a more thorough check. This time, though, he took a new mouthpiece from its plastic seal before the second test, which gave me the all-clear.

Happy driving, but be careful out there!

China's Stolen Children

China’s Stolen Children is an HBO documentary showing how the one-child policy has created a booming trade in stolen children.

Part 1:


Part 2:


Part 3:


Part 4:


Part 5:


Part 6:


Part 7:


Part 8:


Part 9:

Ni Hao, Kai-lan

Coming soon to our local TV is "Ni Hao, Kai-lan" from our friends at Nick! With over 100,000 American students now studying Mandarin (BSD, please add to your foriegn language list!) there are many who are interested. As the producer notes, it also doesn't hurt that Americans have adopted over 60,000 children from China.... Should appear by August, 2008.

Newsweek Article: Baby corruption in China

Well, I've heard about this in the past, but Newsweek has just published an article outlining some of the issues surrounding wealth, priviledge and the one child policy in China. It's interesting that China is now considering adding additional, illegal kids to the corruption rules when dealing with party members. However, what to do with all of their new, wealthy and yuppie urbanites who have the money to defy the rules? Can China continue to police this law, and hundreds of others, when the system that they have allows for the wealthy and party members to circumvent the laws. Instead of being a party for the people, it seems that the only ones to come to the party are the political establishment and wealthy.

While I'm no fan of China's political system, it is apparent to me that this cannot last. The people will not tolerate exceptions based on the size of the bank account or political strings that can be pulled. As this issue, and any issue dealing with the wealthy v. the masses, continue to gain press and notariety, it seems that another revolution may come. It may not be bloody, but I'm curious to see how China reacts and what they will decide to do with their country in the future. They may soon be both one of the wealthiest countries, and one of the poorest countries in the world. And, I believe, they will get nowhere without a moral ground that they can stand on.

Two lives emerged from the ashes

Great article in the LA Times on the book "Saving Levi", which I read recently. Lisa Bentley works with the Philip Hayden Foundation, which I have donated to for a few years. Great read - both the article and the book!

===================
By John M. Glionna, Los Angeles Times Staff Writer December 12, 2007

Levi Bentley at age 4 in Langfang, China. He is standing in the field where he was found when he was about 6 weeks old, so badly burned that he wasn't expected to live. Lisa Misraje Bentley was a bored U.S. homemaker when she reluctantly went to China with her family to open an orphanage. A charred baby boy would change everything.


BEIJING -- Lisa Misraje Bentley watches the boy in the No. 8 jersey as he careens across the soccer field and she marvels. His lower face a mask of scar tissue, his left arm gone at the elbow, the toes on his left foot missing, he zigzags along the green grass in defiance of his disabilities."Isn't he happy?" she says. "Look at the joy coming out of him!"

Bentley knows the boy probably should not be alive. Five years ago, he was left for dead in a cornfield, his tiny body so ravaged by fire that the villagers who found him thought he looked more like a charred log than a 6-week-old baby.

Back then, Bentley was new to China. She had come begrudgingly with her four children, following her husband, John, from Washington state. Together, the couple founded a Christian orphanage for special-needs children -- those most at risk in the Chinese child welfare system, which often lacks the resources to meet the demands of the disabled.

They wanted to help the undesirables. And when Bentley first saw the abandoned baby, gasping for breath inside a hospital incubator, she knew she had found perhaps the most undesirable one of all.

What happened next would test the limits of modern medicine and put Bentley in conflict with local customs, laws, national bureaucracies and even her own family.

Who could have predicted the impact of one small life in China on a bored suburban homemaker from the Pacific Northwest?

Six years ago, Bentley sat in her four-bedroom home in Vancouver, Wash., and felt like crying. As a stay-at-home mother, she lived the good life: Her husband was a successful lawyer. She was pregnant with her fourth child. There was the minivan and the sports car. Yet she was miserable."I thought, 'If this is my life, this stinks,' " she says.

Then came an opportunity. John always had a fascination with China, and had seen his brother start a Christian orphanage in Africa. He wanted to start one in Beijing. Assured financial backing for one year by a Christian philanthropist, John quit his job and prepared for the journey.

Suddenly, the support fell through, but John still wanted to go.Bentley wasn't so sure. She wanted adventure, but China was like another planet. She had no Chinese language skills, and had always had a Woody Allen-like obsession with hygiene. China was no place to take four young children.

"I thought John was insane," she says. "But I said, 'OK, three months.' Then I figured I'd raise hell and we'd come back."

The family's first image of China didn't help. As they landed in Beijing, Bentley's 8-year-old daughter, Emily, looked out the plane window and remarked, "It looks like a trash can."

The couple settled in Langfang, a rural town an hour outside Beijing, and rented a concrete-block home without heat. Bentley remained a mother on guard, listening for the rats that scampered inside the building walls. Both she and John took jobs at a foreign-run orphanage.

No matter how hard she tried to comprehend the culture, China remained mysterious. She had run-ins with local hospital staff and officials, who considered her another pushy American. Bentley didn't fit the image of a Christian aid worker. She's hip and outspoken, likes '60s clothing, and doesn't come on strong with Bible-speak.

She didn't connect here, and she wanted to go home.

The ghastly discovery came on a dreary March day in 2002: A badly burned baby was found in a field. A cluster of curious villagers encircled the infant as he wailed in agony.

The baby's bright yellow jumper was soaked with blood and body fluids. Someone had carefully tucked a 10-yuan note -- less than $2 -- into his pocket.

One by one, the crowd drifted away. What could be done? The baby was sure to die. Except one old man. He saw that the infant's head had been shaved and a bandage remained where an IV had been inserted.

A desperate mother had no doubt tried to save this child and then, in defeat, abandoned him. The old man understood why: This no longer looked like a baby. He reached down. The infant was so charred that ashes fell when he tried to lift its left arm. The little hand was blackened, clenched.

The old man gathered up the baby and rode his bike to a local government office. He left the infant on the doorstep. The boy was rushed to a hospital, diagnosed with third-degree burns over 70% of his body. The orphanage was notified.

When Bentley arrived, she looked down inside the incubator. What she saw "grabbed me by my heart." The baby wailed in agony as he tried to suck his badly burned thumb -- his wounds so deep Bentley could see muscle, tendon and bone.

"This child had no mom, nobody pulling for him," she says.

Just then, Bentley recalls, the baby's eyes flickered. He looked right at her, expectantly, as if to say, "Are you my mother?"

Then Bentley made the decision that changed everything. Ignoring conventional wisdom limiting the jurisdiction of a foreigner in a strange land, she assigned herself as the child's advocate. Doctors discouraged her. They had never seen anyone so badly burned. No matter how much time and money she spent, they warned, this boy is dead.

Bentley named the boy Levi. She liked the sound of it. Later she learned the word means "to bind and unite." She liked the sound of that even more.

Levi's first surgery was a success. Doctor's removed part of his left arm and performed numerous skin grafts. But days later, infection set in. They operated again, taking more of his left arm. There would probably be more amputations.

Bentley flinched. Levi's scarred face and body were bad enough. She felt as though she was losing him limb by limb. That's when an orphanage colleague told her of an e-mail from a Boston surgeon. When told of the burned orphan, the doctor had offered to come to China. Bentley wanted more. Why not take the baby right to physicians at Boston's Shriners Hospitals for Children, where they could use their own equipment in their own surroundings?

She began a race to accomplish something others considered foolhardy: getting a dying, undocumented Chinese baby into the United States. She hadn't even registered Levi's hukou, or permanent residence, with Chinese authorities.Such documentation takes months. Bentley had days, if that. Chinese doctors were preparing for another surgery, perhaps to amputate the boy's remaining hand. She had to act fast. With the help of orphanage staff, she began a telephone and e-mail campaign aimed at foreign charities here and government offices in China and the U.S.

With each call, she learned a little more about how things get done in China. Hardball was out. She had to use connections, or guanxi, with people who were sympathetic to the boy's plight."I couldn't go in as the pushy American, become too highly emotional," she said. "In the U.S. that works. Go in, be the tough bitch, get what I want. That did not work here."

Friends donated baby clothes. Strangers who encountered the boy opened their wallets. People who knew people in power offered to make calls."

Lisa has this innocence, this naivete, about her that gets things done. People want to help her," said Melody Zhang, associate director of an adoption agency called Children's Hope International. "She's not good in dealing with government. Sometimes she has no idea. But she ignored everything for this boy. She had this connection with Levi, a mother's love as strong as it could be."The bureaucratic waters began to part. Levi was granted a hukou. He was issued a passport, and then a U.S. visa. Bentley's cold calls resulted in a free flight for her and the baby.

At home, the situation was not going as well. John felt Lisa was neglecting her family. She wasn't seeing the big picture.The two bickered. Colleagues in the Christian community took notice and began to whisper. "It became a problem for our marriage," John recalls. "Nannies were raising our children. We had 25 other kids at the orphanage. This was just one child."The tensions would eventually lead to talk of a divorce. But Bentley couldn't stop. With $50 in her purse, she boarded a plane for Boston with a baby still bleeding fluids.

Levi approaches a stranger in his kindergarten classroom."I only have one arm," the 5-year-old says cheerfully. "Will you tie my shoes?" He points to his left foot. "This one doesn't have any toes."So far, he has endured more than 20 surgeries, with more to come. As he grows, scar tissue rips and bleeds and must be removed. His left ankle remains bent at an odd angle.

Sometimes, children taunt him, holding out a crooked arm, saying, "I'm Levi!" Some don't want to sit next to him. People stare.But he perseveres with the help of his mother's discipline. She treats him just as she does her biological children or his fellow adopted sibling, a Chinese-born girl named Orly, who's 9. When he falls, he gets up by himself.Slowly, this rambunctious boy is developing a sense of self. He likes dinosaurs and singing his own rap lyrics. A recent self-image shows him as he is: a boy with a missing hand and toes. He even drew the scars.

There are setbacks. In Texas for surgery to create fingers on his right hand, Levi told the doctors he was a big boy and wouldn't cry. His mother had warned him the surgery would not produce perfect fingers, but she knew he hoped it would."When they removed the bandages, they were raw and stubby, not like mine," she says. "I saw his eyes. I knew his heart shrunk."She knows his most difficult days, emotionally, are yet to come, "when he falls in love and physicality becomes an issue." It is pain even a vigilant mother cannot prevent.

And today Bentley is emotionally and legally his mother. Levi was officially adopted in 2006.Lisa and John worked on their marriage, taking a year's leave of absence to return to the U.S. for couple's therapy.Not long ago, they faced a dilemma: If they didn't return to the U.S. immediately, the Bentleys risked losing their home and cars to repossession. They stayed put. China was home now, and their work with orphans was too important to abandon.Now, life in the U.S. suburbs seems like the other planet. They run their own Beijing-area foster home, Harmony Family House, with a deaf school to help poor Chinese mothers cope with raising special-needs children. Bentley calls these mothers heroes.

The circumstances behind Levi's injuries remain a mystery. But Bentley doesn't blame the mother. "I believe it was a terrible accident that befell a poor mother without resources," she says.She produces a tiny yellow bootie, part of the outfit she calls Levi's burial clothes. "How can you condemn her? She did what she could for her baby. Then wrapped him up and left him to die peacefully. Imagine how hard that must have been."

For years, Bentley was hard on herself, thinking she was never good enough. That's changed. At 43, she accepts who she is, the kind of kooky redhead who dares to be different, who knows it's all right to stand out either within the Christian community, back home in the U.S. or even here in China."I'm no longer afraid to say, 'This is the way I am.' I'm not trying to hide anymore," she says. "For the first time in my life, I'm comfortable in my own shoes."And a little boy no one else wanted made that happen.This year, she published a book on her experiences. It's called "Saving Levi: Left to Die . . . Destined to Live."Bentley knows the boy wasn't the only one who was saved.

New Newsweek Article on China Orphanages

Well, here is quite an extensive article from Newsweek on China's orphanages. It's a nice human interest story, and a nice look at how many orphanages now run...

Helping

Today was one of those days where you just find the time to help a friend. Good friends are waiting for their referral for their child from China - they DTC'd (Dossier to China for the non-china adoption folks) way back in June 2006. At this point they have been told to anticipate a referral at least a year from now - which is 2-2.5 years after paperwork submitted in order to get a referral. So - like many others - they are considering moving to a waiting child from China to expedite the process. Since they are paperwork ready they could be in China in about 6 months if it all goes smoothly.

However, one of my favorite agencies just hasn't made it easy for them - or for others in fact. They allow multiple families to review the file of a child at one time, and then if they are all interested, they get to "bid" on which family is best for the child. It actually is the reason that I moved from that favorite agency for my latest adoption. I realize that they are doing their best to find the best family for a child - but they are forgetting that the parents are their client, and the ones responsible for paying the bill!

It's such a tricky thing - navigating the adoption process - especially as a first time adopter. And so often these agencies who think they are doing the right thing are really making it much more difficult. Don't pass judgements on families who you have already approved for adoption. Don't make the road to adoption so hard - you'll put yourselves out of business. Find the balance.

So - for J & S - hang in there. Your child will come, and he or she will be the perfect one for you! It's amazing how many deadends I headed down before finding Miss Lucy. It doesn't seem to make sense, but in the end it really does.

What have I been doing for almost 6 weeks?

Well, it's easy - adjusting! Adjusting to coming home, 3 kids, keeping up the house with a permanently affixed 2 year old hanging on my leg, going to the doctors (for all of them) and more!

Let's see if I can give some brief updates:

Coming home from Guangzhou:
It's just a miracle we made it back at all, I have to admit. On the way home from GZ I decided that I could handle escorting the 7 year old son of a work colleague home on the plane, so on the morning of the 15th we met in the lobby of the White Swan and made our way to the airport. Lucky that we got there early, and lucky that I was flying b-class, as the flight from GZ to Tokyo was cancelled. We were the first in line, and a mere two hours of waiting later, we had been scheduled on an ANA flight from GZ to Tokyo that would get us there with plenty of time to spare for our flight. And even better, they upgraded Will (my 7 yo companion) into b-class as well.

Well, I have to tell you that ANA is a lovely airline, and they flight attendants did their very best to keep Miss Lucy happy and occupied while we were on the flight. It didn't work, but they did their best.

We got to Tokyo with plenty of time to spare for our 6p flight to SEA. I figured the first thing to do would be to get our boarding passes for flight 85 (they wouldn't print in GZ) so we went to the ticket counter. While we were there they agent was quite frantic, and finally told me that we would have to go to the gate to fix the seat issues (they were trying to put Lucy is a seperate row from me). Well, while we were in the air NWA decided to move us from flight 85 to flight 8 - and they were holding the plane for us to board! We finally got seats, and got someone in b-class to move to another seat, since I wasn't about to sit seperately from Lucy. We literally had 10 minutes or less between the flights - we got on board, they closed the door and off they went. The bummer was that our baggage was labeled for flight 85, and when we didn't get on it, they pulled it in Tokyo, which explained why in SEA we had no luggage. We had it delivered the next day. The other bummer was that no one knew we were on this flight, so after landing, we had to finally call and let folks know that we were here and come and pick us up!

I don't want another flight like this last one. At least Lucy slept most of the way from Tokyo to SEA.

Home:
Well, it's been crazy and I'm sure I'll have more to say, but the first week I slept, got Lucy a crib and a new car seat since she is so small, and got over jet lag. The second week I started to plan what to do with my time. The third week I started to work, and have kept on doing home projects ever since then. I know it's probably not the best to spend all my leave time doing stuff like worrying about new doors, making orthodonist appointments, and such - but it's so nice not to do it at work! I need about 2 more weeks.

Things that I still need to do:

• Call Lowes and find out if they found my measurements for the doors I'm ordering yet - they seem to have lost them
• Call the roofers back - they did the roof expect for the garage, and I'd like it to all look the same. I'm waiting for a bid.
• Call Ed back - he is the guy who is giong to do the inside ceilings after the water damage post-windstorm last fall.
• Take Viivi to pass her written test, and then fast track her for the driven test.
• Dermatologist for Ella, since her mystery "itchies" are getting worse and spreading
• Follow up with neurologist, and Gwenn's meds seem to have plateaued
• Still search for a pediatric cardiologist, since Dr. Stamm is like 80 - and talk about repeating the echo test
• Go to the InSpa for a day and get ready to go back to work
• Call vet - all 3 animals still need to go

Oh yah - and stop worrying about what I'm not getting done, since I'm supposed to be spending time with the girls.

GZ: The new Vegas

Being in Guangzhou is like being in Las Vegas. It seems like there is one purpose for each city... Las Vegas is to gamble, and in GZ it is to shop. And there are similarities between the cities:

• Ungodly hot
• No clocks, so you have no idea what day or what time it is
• Lots of people whose purpose is to keep you on task (gambling or shopping)
• Easy access to food so you can quickly be back on task when you need a break

Our official business in GZ is now complete - that of receiving our children's visa's into the United States. I processed through on Weds with about 60 other families. A similar number processed through yesterday from what I understand. The hotel (White Swan) is a 5 Star hotel that has a new second purpose in the last 10 years - hosting the American families who are waiting to bring their children home. It was convenient - just a few blocks to the consulate. However, the consulate moved a year ago, and we still have the WS as our base - I think because it would be too hard for all the businesses supporting the adoptions to move to another location. And, here on Shamian Island, we are nicely isolated from the rest of this 14M person city.

Earlier in the week when we arrived (last Saturday - egads, it's almost a week) there were probably over 200 families here at the WS (not counting those who hang out at the Victory). Now there are very few families left, people like me who could not get flights out. Starting today and tomorrow next weeks batches of parents and their kiddos will start to arrive. Thankfully, I get to leave on Sunday and I'm beyond thrilled. At this point, all you want to do is to get home. Three weeks is a very long time - and while I'm still hopeful that the wait list will pop my name onto it, I don't think that it is going to.

Guangzhou

Well, it's Monday night and we got into Guangzhou (GZ) at noon on Saturday. It's amazing at this time in the travel how fast everything seems to go. Saturday was just settling in, finding our way around, etc.

On Sunday we got to do some sightseeing - we visited the Six Banyan Buddhist Temple and got to tour, and have the babies blessed by the monks. Very cute. We also went to the Chen Family Academy (was a home, then a school, now a museum/gift shop). I've been to both places 3 times now, so the initial suprise is sort of gone. At the temple I just went shopping - found a great Tanka (Buddhist silk and painted hanging) at the Tibetian Buddhist shop near the temple.

At the Chen Academy I have been enthralled every time I've been there. They continue to restore the building and the amazing ceramics that are on the ridges.

They also have updated their museum displays, and it was really interesting this time around. They had puppets, displays of furniture that were in the home, embroidery (very cool) and lots of carvings.

After the Academy we were off to the local Jade carving factory. These stores are government run, but sell the highest quality of jade that is guaranteed in writing. It is very, very expensive. It is fun to look, but I will stick with the "B" or "C" quality jade and be quite happy, thank you very much.

Sunday afternoon after naps (2 hours this time) we met as a group to do paperwork. The dads took the kids to the play room here at the hotel, while the moms took off to do the paperwork. A grueling 2.5 hours later, we were done - thank goodness. Lucy held it together while I was gone, which was great - and then we grabbed dinner and went to bed.

Today was Monday, and it flew by. We met at 8:30a to head to the medical appointment. It was tough being ready so early, but I'm so glad we did. By the time we left at 9:30, there was a HUGE line of adoptive parents waiting to have their kiddos checked out.

At the medical office, there are 3 basic stations - height/weight; ENT; general health. Passed all with flying colors and the doctor who saw Lucy liked her - and thinks she has "spirit". Too bad she isn't around when her "spirit" is in full force... then maybe she wouldn't think Lucy is so cute!

After we were done getting our approvals for medical, we were off to walk through the traditional medicine market - they had all sorts of stuff there, and you could have medicines mixed for you based on what a doctor prescribed. You could also purchase pets near the market, and you could also get animals - snakes, turtles, scorpions - to purchase for medicine.

We walked for less than 50 minutes, and I was soaked straight through. We went to the pearl market and looked around - but the prices were FAR more expensive than the Hongqiao Market in BJ. Far better deals there for same or better quality pearls.

After that, Lucy was toast (literally) and we came back and went straight to bed for our nap. She slept today for 3.5 hours! We got up and went to the pool, and swam for another 2 hours, had dinner and went right back to bed. And, that is a typical day here. Up, eat, paperwork, nap (lunch if we are lucky), small play, dinner, bed.

Tomorrow is the consulate appointment #1. This one we don't go to, but we are around the hotel in case they need us for something. We go to the consulate on Weds and swear our oath that we will be great parents to our children. I wonder if our children would always agree to what we said we'd do... I guess that is why they don't always have choices in these matters...

Busy two days

Well, we are now back in Fuzhou, and it is Thursday night. We have one more full day here, and then we are off to Guangzhou on Saturday for the last part of the trip.

On Tuesday Michelle, Travis, Shen - along with Lucy and me - headed to Xiamen. I thought it was hot in Fuzhou, but it is not even funny how hot it was there. Yikes. Lucy was still running a low-grade fever, and we've now progressed to a healthy little cough. Tylenol Cold seems to do the trick, and she is sleeping well, although having fits. If temper tantrums were an olympic sport, Lucy would be a gold medalist.

Yesterday (Weds) was a big day for us in Xiamen - not only was it the 4th of July - but we were able to visit Lucy's orphanage, get her original surgical notes from the Xiamen University hospital, and visit her findng location. Not bad for a Wednesday.

We started in the morning with visiting Lucy's orphanage - Xiamen Social Welfare Institute. I had heard from my pediatrician that it is one of the best orphanages in all of China - and doesn't need any groups like Half the Sky in there, so I was prepared for the best. We got to the main door, and then hiked up to the 3rd level. On the 2nd level we could hear kids, and saw some older kids, but we weren't able to visit there.

Up to the 3rd level, and we met the Director in her office. The 3rd level is also home to the younger kids - there were about 40 kids there, from preemie newborns who were just TINY, to kids just shy of 3 years old. There are two rooms with cribs - the 1st room with the pink cribs was for the littlest babies - although there were some older kids in there getting extra attention. They were amazingly well cared for, although I don't think that this would replace a family to care for these kiddos at all. The children were all beautiful, and you had to wonder with some why there were there. Almost all were girls, and some had obvious issues - downs syndrome, missing digits, extra digits, preemie - but then there were others that were there just because they were girls. There was a sweet little guy who looked like he was new (they list birthdate and date of entry to the SWI on their cards) and had obviously been severely neglected wherever he had been. They were giving him extra loving care, and I hope that he will respond well. Some of the newborns were just that - newborn. About 2 looked to be significantly premature, and all were being well cared for.

In the second room was the older kids - with the silver cribs. This is the room that Lucy has been living in for the past month after returning from living with a foster family. I have a picture of her crib that I'll put below - when you see a silver crib witihout anyone in it, that was Lucy's. Here the kiddos were older - anywhere from 8 months to 3 years - and about half were in the midst of playtime, and the other half looked like they were just waking up from morning naps.

I have more pictures that I hope to post later on this week, or once we are in Guangzhou.

So after the visit to the orphanage we went on a tour of Gulang Yu - a small island off of Xiamen Island. However, by the time that the ferry ride was done, Lucy was so tired, hot and still fighting her fever, she has pitched a fit at least 3 times...and so I headed back to the hotel with her to get her to sleep while the Michelle & Travis continued to look around Gulang Yu. Lucy had a great nap, and then at 3:30 I met our guide, David, and we walked a couple of blocks to the Xiamen University hospital, which we can actually see from our hotel. We walked up, saw the Heart Center building, went there, and soon were on the 11th Floor at the medical records department, asking for copies of the surgical notes from Lucy's VSD surgery that she had. We had to show my passport, as well as the adoption documents to prove she was mine, but in less than 15 minutes we had them all copied for all of a 50 cent charge.

From there, a suprise - David had the information on Lucy's finding location, and so we found a taxi to bring us there. The first taxi drivers didn't know where it was, but we got lucky with the next driver. He knew the area well, and off we went. And it was remote, we drove through dirt roads, under a tunnel and to the end of the road, and he told us to go up the stairs, and we'd be there. I had been told that it was a train station - but really it was just a train crossing. It was a mean, tough, poor part of town. Lots of people there, but it was definately out in the elements. Dirt was the norm, trash was everywhere, and it was just the concrete where the train crossed - and that is where in August 2005 Lucy was left at 4 months old to be found by someone. At first, I had thought that if it was a train station, she could have been from anywhere. When I was actually there, it was obvious that only people who lived around there knew about this spot, and she came from this little neighborhood.

Right about where I'm standing is where Lucy was found. If interested, I have additional pictures to post, and someday I can share them with her - but the experience definately moved me. It was sad to think that there are over 100 thousand kids each year - girls and those with medical issues like Lucy - who are abandoned in the attempt to have a boy, or a healthy child who the families can afford to care for.

It strikes me odd that in this communist country, where it is supposed to be about equality of the people, that you have to pay for education if you want one, pay for medical care... Even in the US, which is supposedly the bastion of commercialism, we get a free education, and while healthcare access is tough for some, you can get emergency care if it's needed. Here most children are delivered in the home still because you have to pre-pay before you can even walk into a hospital... Now, housing is subsidized, and other costs are currently still low. However, as their middle class increases, and costs increase as China embraces this new world of free market enterprise - I wonder that we won't see the rich continuing to get richer, and the poor staying still amazingly poor. But, that is something else to think about for another day. There is so much growth here, it reminds me of either the old west or the early 20th century, with growth happening as a sprint, not a marathon...

Today we returned to Fuzhou from Xiamen, and it's nice to be back "home". We went out for dinner tonight, and then for a walk. We made it down to the local park where there is ballroom dancing each night, when Lucy lost it. However, right up to the shoulder, and she was asleep in just a minute! We made it home tonight, and she barely woke up as I got her into jammies and into bed.

Well, here is a last picture of Lucy when we got home tonight from the park. Busy day tomorrow - we get to visit the Fuzhou Social Welfare Institute where Shen had lived, and then the police station in the afternoon, which is the start of our last adoption work in the province.